My dad asked if I could show you my cartoons this week. I had a whole thing written about Mom and her family and what it was like growing up with all those brothers and sisters, but no, Dad wants me to show you my cartoons instead.

You have to understand, my dad loves cartoons. It must have been because Grandpa Max only let him watch old Warner Brothers cartoons as a kid or something. Or maybe it was all those old Superman and Supergirl comic books he read. All I really know is that if the Cartoon Network hadn't come to our cable company, he'd probably never watch TV.

When I first got interested in art, Mom would always tell me how nice my watercolors were and how she liked my oil painting. And Dad raved about my cartoons.

Well, you've seen my cartoon self a few times already, I may as well show you the rest of the family.

This is Mom. She's not always wearing a dress, but this is how I picture her whenever I think of her. Yeah, her and Dad have that hippie, 60's look. She has that whole Earth Mother thing going. She's always trying to get us all to eat right. Mom was the first person asking for the city to start recycling. And she loves animals. We have four cats, two birds, and a large dog. Well, those are our animals, that doesn't count the ones we get from the Animal Rescue people to board. I'm not sure I should say more about that. I think Cleveland Heights has some kind of ordinance about how many animals you can have. Mom's also into the whole "holistic medicine" thing, so she grows all these herbs and plants.

Of course, then there's my sister Laura, Laura, the cyber freak. The girl stays glued to the computer. I don't EVEN want to know what she's doing. The FBI even showed up once. Let's see, I drew this picture AFTER she cut her hair, but before the bleach job grew out. Laura is 16 and strange. She's a straight "A" student, but comes off like some radical non-conformist. Laura is always being called into the Principal's Office at school. She just started dating and has the absolutely worst taste in boys. They either look like nerds or junkies. I know he'll deny it, but I think Laura is my dad's favorite. Oh, not that she gets any real special treatment. Dad's always been fair about that. I think he thinks she's the most like him. Laura and I don't get along too well. Mom keeps telling us that when we grow up, we'll treasure each other like she does her sisters. Yeah, right.

My baby sister, Margie, is okay. She just turned 13 and is going through all that "what's it mean to be a girl?" thing. I do my best to keep her from talking to Laura about it. God knows what she'd tell her. Margie's a lot like Mom. She loves working in the garden and playing with the animals. She says that she wants to be a vet when she grows up. Dad thinks it's a great idea, as long as she gives family discounts. I miss having her around, now that I'm at Kent. She's always been a cool little girl.

Well, let's finish this off with my last cartoon. The one you've been waiting for. (Please, ladies, keep your clothes on.) Here's my picture of Jesse James MarxLennon, radio and TV personality and my dad.

Yep, that's what he looks like. Long hair, beard, kinda skinny, hole in the knee of his jeans. My daddy. He is almost constantly embarrassing me in public. I've already told you about the problem with girls and women. Then there's just the weird stuff he does all by himself. He always tells me the stupidest jokes just as I'm drinking something. It's as if he loves seeing milk come out of my nose.

I love my dad, really I do. When we were little, before we went to school, Dad would always be there playing with us. I guess that's an advantage of always working nights.

Well, that's it. My cartoon family. Next week I want to tell you more about Mom.

Okay, Dad, I'm done now.

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